Processing Offense and Wounds

Forgiving and releasing can be difficult. Learning to quickly process lies, accusations, bullying, and painful events is a necessity for those serious about walking free. Since it can be like a wrestling match with your brain and emotions to let go of painful events and wounds, I’m going to list some ideas on how to process temptations to hold on to offense. 

The following verse gives some great insight on what will be necessary to be victorious!

1 Peter 5:6-8  (NKJV)

⁶ Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, ⁷ casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. ⁸ Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.

1. Humble Yourself.
   1. It’s Jesus’ humility that spurred Him on to forgiving those who put Him on the cross. And if you look at the story of Stephen, he too showed great humility in forgiving those that were stoning him while they were throwing the stones.
2. Cast Your Care On Him
   1. Casting what has hurt you on Jesus is the only way to clean the wound and heal the memory.

Now, humbling yourself is fairly easy. Submitting to Luke 6:37 to forgive a person or event is humbling. Remembering what Jesus did for us is also humbling if we really understand the full implication of what He did.

Here are some tools or ideas on processing the “casting the care” onto Jesus.

Begin Quoting the Word

The Word is powerful! If you can grab onto scripture and hang on, it will produce a renewing of the mind and power to do the right thing!
CASE #1: Teresa could not get along with a peer. No matter how many times she forgave, her co-worker lied and set her up. Teresa began to despise working with her. She knew she could not hate her, but thoughts of hatred continued to control her thoughts. Finally, she began reciting Philippians 4:8: Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.

Teresa began quoting the verse every time offense rose up. She had to be aggresive and make her flesh submit, but she was able to get control of her thoughts. Next, she forgave and prayed for the woman. A root of bitterness could have sprung up easily had she not resisted it.

CASE #2: If you find that you cannot cast an offense onto Christ, asking Him for a scripture can be very helpful if you’ll hold on to it and let it do its work. Lance had enough of the lies  from one of his family members. He was finished with him. Yet, when Lance prayed, he heard 1 Peter 4:8 in his spirit that love covers a multitude of sin. The problem with Lance was that his irritation with his family member had become offense. When he heard the name of the ‘offender,’ he became angry and struggled with hatred. Because of the scripture, he realized he did not love Bob like he should . He began to quote the scripture and then ask the Lord to put His kind of love in Lances’s heart for Bob. As he prayed for Bob that love did come. Once the love of God was flowing trough Lance, he could make better decisions on his relationship without sinning himself!

Asking the Lord to Process problem into an Object

Sometimes it is easier to give something to Jesus if we transfer the emotions and pain into an object.
CASE #1: Monica was standing in church before service.  A friend walked up and told her that her spouse had said some mean things about Monica. Monica had been through inner healing and deliverance and did not feel rejected.  However, when the friend left and the worship began, Monica began to think about what she should have said about the  accusations. Worshiping became difficult. She recited Ephesians 4:8 and tried to think good thoughts but the thoughts of the conversation before church kept erupting. Finally, Monica asked the Lord, “Father, I don’t know how to process this and keep it from taking root.  I need You to show me what this mental assault looks like. Show me what it looks like to You and I will hand it over.”  Immediately she saw a bullet in her mind. A bullet. She thought about the fiery darts of the enemy and how much damage a launched bullet could do. She said out loud, “Lord, I take this bullet right now and hand it over to you. I offer this bullet in obedience to Your word. Please take it!” Her report is that immediately the assault on her senses left. 

CASE #2: Izabella had a difficult time allowing the Lord to take the shame of past sin. She accepted He had forgiven her but could not forgive herself. After asking the Lord to take the shame and show her what it actually looked like she immediately saw a gaping wound with a disgusting mound of infection flowing from it. She could not imagine handing it over to Jesus or putting it in His hands. But, she was able to just say, “Lord, I didn’t know how nasty the shame is.  I lay this at your feet. Please take it.” He did. The shame left. This exercise just helped her process what she could not express with emotions or words.

Get a new perspective!

Forgiving and casting your care can be as easy as climbing higher and getting a new perspective! There’s no one who sees the ‘whole picture’ like Christ, so why not ask for His wisdom!

CASE #1: Angela had great difficulty forgiving her mother for the mistakes of her past. She did not respect her mother and even though she loved her mom, she had no compassion left for her.

Angela always felt belittled around her mother. The woman was happy at church but at home was cranky and impatient with her children.

Angela was so offended, hurt, and fed up with her mother that it made her miserable. She acknowledged what the Word says about honoring your parents, but she nearly loathed hers.

In an effort to obey the Word, Angela asked the Lord for some information to help her widen her perspective. 

Once when we were praying, Angela had received healing when she asked the Lord to show her how He viewed her. She decided to do the same with her mother. She asked, “Lord, if it is okay with you, would you show me how my mom sees herself?”

What Holy Spirit showed her was shocking. She saw a gangly 12 year old girl who was disheveled. Just the site of what she was shown produced a download of compassion. If her mother saw herself like the picture she was given, it would explain a lot. Angela cast the anger and pain upon the Lord and received healing herself.